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Showing posts from June, 2020

A new me ?

I feel lonely. I crave distractions. I wonder what is the conclusion of the book "Amusing ourselves to death"... Isn't everything just distraction ? To get rid of my obligation (my "shoulds") and instead leave space for my wants, I used to think highly the "fuck it" way of life (or at least give less fucks). Today, especially, I was thinking to myself. What if f I or the things I do don't matter ? Wouldn't it be freeing ? So I went out and started not to give a shit. As a result, I wasn't particularly well dressed (as always) but above all I wasn't smiling and wasn't looking at people with a gentle look. To put it briefly I wasn't shining. Needless to say, whereas I felt just fine, I also noticed that the people I passed by were also reciprocating my attitude (to a certain extent at least). But then I realized: "If mattering partially depends on the impact one could have on each other, then a single second of attention impl